


We only see eachother at weddings and funerals

by SharkEnthusiast



Series: Not your typical family [3]
Category: The Umbrella Academy (TV)
Genre: F/M, Light Angst, Oh My God, Weddings
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-01
Updated: 2019-05-18
Packaged: 2020-02-10 18:07:26
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 2,149
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18665614
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SharkEnthusiast/pseuds/SharkEnthusiast
Summary: Eudora Patch and Diego Hargreeves are getting married.And not only are all of Eudora's crazy in-laws coming, but Diego's even crazier siblings are too.Plus, Klaus is giving Diego's best man speech because Diego has no friends.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Dude their getting married and in happy for them even though I wrote this
> 
>  
> 
> Dear lord

Eudora is itchy. It's the white plastic flowers braided into her hair and the cheap dress and this stupid, stupid corsage around her wrist.   
But it doesn't really matter because she's getting married.

 

 

 

  
To Diego, no less.    
Diego Hargreeves. She never would of thought she would get married to a superhero.    
Her older sister Alma is fluttering around her like one weepy, large bird, and Eudora almost wants to laugh at the absurdity of this whole situation.    
"I can't believe you're married." Alma smiles at her through the mirror, and places her hands on Eudora's shoulders. She smiles back.    
"Yeah. Me neither."    
It feels like the end of an era. Like the whole world's ending but it's okay because there is a whole new one beginning.   
Wow, look at her and her poetry.    
Alma grabs her hand as they make their way to the church where their dad will meet Eudora.    
"He's really good for you." She whispers into her ear. "No cold feet, Dora. He loves you a lot, and I know that you love him a lot too."    
Alma, always poised, lets go of Eudora's hand with a grin and a wink. "Break a leg." She stage whispers, loud enough for their dad to hear.    
Eudora forces a laugh through her teeth and watches as Alma leaves to claim a seat by the front of the church.    
Neither her or Diego are religious, but neither of them entirely knew what they were doing in planning the wedding either, so church it was. 

She turns to her father.

“Hey, Dad.” She whispers, looping her arm through his.

“Nervous?” He asks her, and she nods a little and laughs.

“Yeah. A little.” 

“You know, I'm not entirely sure what Alma said to you back there, it it's probably pretty similar to what I'm gonna say to you here.” Eudora nods again.

Damn, her feet are already starting to ache from the heels.

“I love you a lot, kiddo.” 

“Alma just said not to get cold feet.” 

Her father snorts. Then pulls up his sleeve to check his watch.

“Yeah, sounds about right. You ready?” He says

“Yeah.” Eudora's stomach flips, and she pulls herself tighter to her dad.

She's ready. She loves Diego. And He loves her. Plus, after this is over, they can go back to their small house and eat all the leftover food on the wedding  plates. (They have been really needing plates). Why is she nervous? This is completely ridiculous. This is  _ Diego, _ who last week almost burned the house down. Who really loves his Mom even though she's not coming to the wedding and who ate a whole jar of peanut butter in one sitting.

(It was the kind with tons of sugar in it, because apparently, Diego grew up with all natural, organic, zero sugar stuff, and now he'll only eat the really unhealthy kind) (Even after that, he still claims he has healthy eating habits and that “his body is a temple”)

Eudora pushes through the front doors, her father on her arm only to see Diego at the end of the aisle,  _ already _ crying. 

Jesus.


	2. Chapter two

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Klaus is a mess

Diego's crying again. 

He cried when Eudora walked into the church and cried when they said their vows and finally stopped crying when the reception started.

And now he's crying again.

Over  _ Klaus.  _

And it's not like your silent movie type, one tear kind of thing, it's crying so hard his eyes are red and his cheeks are wet and there are tears clinging to his jaw. 

Klaus feels strangely endeared to be cried over. 

He's worn his best leather pants and his best jacket which Klaus finds very funny because they are his only leather pants and his only jacket. 

He stands up from his chair and clears his throat loud enough that the 20 people that actually showed can hear him. 

Wow, this is actually kind of sad. 

Vanya snorts from beside him.

Whoops, must of said that aloud. 

“Anyway!” Klaus claps his hands once and watches as Diego immediately stops crying and sends his a look that is definitely ‘ _ be freaking normal for once. Don't screw this up, fuckface _ .’ Okay, maybe not the fuckface part.

“So… I'm gonna keep this as short as possible.” God, he really should of prepared. 

“If you didn't already know I'm Klaus, Diego's brother. And his best man. That's why I'm making this speech!” Now Eudora is giving his the death stare too and Klaus is kind of scared because he actually doesn't know her all that well.

He knows her grandma, though. They met just a couple minutes ago, and she's already Klaus’ favorite here by far.

Besides maybe Vanya.

And of course, Ben.

“Well. Diego's really great guy. And Eudora's a really cool lady! Guess they're made to be!” Klaus laughs at his own joke. No one else does.

Diego now has a desperate look in his eyes, and he's eyeing Eudora's dad nervously. Klaus takes a deep breath, trying to compose some words in his head that aren't batshit crazy.

“I remember that when we were kids,” He sighs. Wishes he hadn't chose this path. 

“Diego and my other brother Ben, were always there for me. Even when I was super annoying or a hassle or just generally too much, they'd be there. There were a couple of times when things got just, super duper bad, and they helped me through it.” He can't stop now.

Goddamn.

“I remember that after Ben died, the whole family was very detached. Since there were so many of us, we had all had our own little groups and with Ben and Five gone, they didn't quite work. I just have this memory of it being deathly silent after. And this one day, a week after the funeral, Diego comes into my room with his stupid turtle neck on,” Klaus watches Diego's mouth turn into a frown.

“And says ‘hey. Wanna get out of here?’. And we do. We stole our dads car and drove to a motel and then went out to get waffles.” God, he hates this. Hed much rather be getting high or sleeping or telling a joke. Klaus doesn't do serious. 

“ So Diego's a really great brother. And when I met Eudora a couple of Christmas’ ago, I could just kind of see that they fit. They really love each other, and I can tell. Um. To Eudora and Diego?” 

Klaus lets out a breath he didn't know he was holding and grins. Not too bad for a first time.

Not that he'll be getting very many invitations to be someone's best man. He sits back down and Vanya hugs him from the side.

“Good job.” She whispers. 

“You too.” Klaus says back.

Vanya snorts. Again. 

Diego's heading towards him and Klaus is a little surprised that there aren't any tears in site.

“Dude.” Diego says, patting his arm awkwardly.

And then the waterworks start. Diego's crying and getting tears all over his jacket and Klaus might be crying a little but It's only a little. 

“I love you a lot, man.” Diego says, pulling away and rubbing his eyes. 

“Yeah, I love you too.” 

Diego doesn't say anything.

“Can I uh. Hit the bar now?” Klaus asks, craning his neck to see if there's any of the really good champagne left.

Diego snorts.

Wow, looks like that runs in the family.

That and mental health issues. 

“Sure, man. Just don't get too drunk.”

“I'll try my best.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I cannot write Klaus for crap and that's why I havent ever um so.  
> I'm not entirely happy eith this but its okayish. Whatever


	3. Chapter Three

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Aftermath and Diego is angsty but Eudora loves him.

They only got one set of plates. From Eudora’s Grandmother. They’re misshapen and brown and Diego has put money on the bet that she made them in old lady pottery class.

 

(They got cake domes and  cookie cooling racks, silver, and even a trash can but only one set of plates)

 

Eudora wants to scold him for making fun of them, but she never gets around to it.

(There are relatives to hug and cake to eat and photos to be taken.)

After the wedding and the after party, Diego and Eudora drive home with a stack of butt ugly brown plates, a crap ton of wedding cake, and whole lot of tears. Eudora places her hand into Diego’s while he drives. Squeezes tight and hard and prays to God he doesn’t crash.

They are both crying. Eudora is not completely sure why. They pull up at their new, dinky little house, with the stars stamped into the shutters, the cracked ceiling and the perpetual smell of old lady, and sit. Diego doesn’t pull his hand away and doesn't look at Eudora and doesn’t go inside. He just sits there, keys in engine, silent.

They both are.

Eudora doesn’t know how long they sit there but it’s Diego who finally breaks it.

“I love you so much it hurts sometimes.” He whispers out, clutching her hand like a lifeline.

Eudora smiles.  Bittersweet. She's finally cracked the puzzle that is Diego Hargreeves.

“Me too.”

Diego shuts off the engine and they go inside.

They do not let go of each others hands.

Diego unlocks the front door with a flourish, allowing Eudora to go before him.

“Well.” She says one he's locked the door behind him. She had to let go of his hand when going through the door because both their hands are getting sweaty and gross. Diego smiles at her.

“Well, guess we got married.” Eudora laughs for a little too long. “Want some cake?”

Eudora frowns.

“Aren't you supposed to freeze it and eat it at our anniversary?”

Diego grins.

She never did expect herself marrying a superhero and a vigilante and an utter trouble maker.

Diego lifts the box that holds the top tier of the cake.

“Yeah, I guess, but when have you ever followed the rules, Eudora?” She rolls her eyes. Scoffs.

“Always. I always follow the rules. I'm a cop.” Diego is still grinning like a maniac and like he's about to do something a little more dangerous than just eating cake early.

“Yeah, and I trained to be one. But when has that ever stopped me? Come on. Live a little.” He sifts through the silver and pulls out a pair of forks and sets them down on the table with a light thunk.

"Please?" He asks, using the huge, brown, doe eyes on her. The ones he knows she can't resist. Eudora rolls her eyes, but grabs the ugly plates and the cake cutter and gets to work. She hands a plate to Diego and helps herself to one, too.

It's silent. Not the bad kind, but the comfortable, tired silence.

Diego clears his throat.

"Thanks." Eudora raised an eyebrow, fork of cake halfway to her mouth.

"What, for giving you cake?"

She watches him. Runs her eyes over the scars and the doe eyes and the sad mouth.

"For marrying me." Eudora's mouth turns up into a sad smile. She wants to laugh, but the sound gets caught in her throat along with any words to say.

"No no nonono. Don't give me that look." Diego says, putting his plate down so he can gesture around with his hands. "I mean I'm angry most of the time and actually kind of stupid and I have an unhealthy dependency on you, plus not to mention the knives-"

Eudora cuts him off with a slap to his head.

"You're right. You are actually stupid sometimes, Hargreeves. Do you think I married you cause you persuaded me to? Your only way of persuasion is scaring someone, and I don't scare easy." She watches him flinch and immediately backtracks. She sits closer to him and rests her hand in his. "I am in love with you, Diego. I didn't get married to you cause you're rich or used to be a superhero or cause you somehow persuaded me. I am in love with you. I wouldn't be sitting here if I didn't." She kisses him. Slow, gentle. Like they have all the time in the world (they do), and like everything in the world matters (it does).

Fuck Reginald Hargreeves, his training, his abuse and his stupid accent. Fuck him for telling Diego that it was impossible for someone to love him because it's not true.

She kisses him again. Again, again. In her scratchy, cheap dress and his suit with the crooked tie. They pull away but it's not awkward because _for once in his life someone loves him just as much as they love him_ and that's weirdly refreshing.

Eudora squeezes his hand tighter. Scooches closer to him and rests her head on his shoulder.

He doesn't move. For once in his life he doesn't flinch away and isn't idly spinning a knife in between his fingers.

"Eudora?" He whispers. Tentative. Careful. Treading lightly.

"Some day, you really have to meet my mom."

Eudora hums.

"I'm looking forward to it."

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wow! So thats it! Tell me wether or not I should make another work in this series!


End file.
